Wednesday, August 11, 2010


I have a dilemma of a personal nature, which I have started to think about quite a bit, especially at night. Those of you that have lived in a tent will understand. For those of you that haven't, well, sorry.

The issue is this: should I pee in my tent at night?

Why would I want to do such a god awful thing? First, I have to get up several times in the night to wee. At home its not a problem, because we have a toilet and there aren't scorpions or giant spiders roaming around the bedroom, so the whole ordeal takes 45 seconds and I fall right back to sleep. Second, getting out of the tent is a big ordeal. It involves finding my headlamp, putting on shoes, undoing the tent zipper (which is secured with my burglar-proof safety pin), and trekking out to nowhere to pee beside a bush and inadvertently all over my feet. Last, arachnids have a reflective layer on all 8 of their eyes, so when you are out at night you can see that your world is literally crawling with them. Big ones, with their glowing sets of devil eyes. I know they are there anyhow, but find it a bit disconcerting to face at midnight, and 3am, and 5am. So, then I am all awake and have the heebie-jebbies, and before long, it is time to go all over again.

So, why not pee in my tent? Well, it just seems like something that a grown woman should not do. Plus there is the issue of what to pee into. I once cut the lid off a 1 liter water bottle and tried that, but I was terrified that I would knock it over in the night, and in fact, nearly did. And then I had to take the morning walk of shame with my bright yellow pee jug. So, its pretty gross and could spill and you look like a total creep in the morning. I suppose I could get some sort of specialized pee container with a lid, but that still doesn't solve the grossness or the walk of shame. A special whiz container sounds horrible, but is it less horrible than having to leave the "comfort" of my tent three-ish times a night for some 250-odd nights?

I just don't know where I should go.


  1. Well... I can't say it won't be a little gross... but I promise not to think you're a creep if you have to do the pee jug walk of shame in the morning!

  2. You can buy a discreet 'urinal bag' for camping I believe.

    I figure if you go all that way to stay in a tent and collect critter poo - there really is no shame :-)

    I totally understand the need to go a few times a night, and I wouldn't leave the tent to do so - but then again I'm not real keen on tents to begin with...

    Whatever you do, don't drink beer there!

  3. Did I explain how you can pee without spills into the cut-off Eau Vive bottle? I believe I did. There are also ways of bluffing so that there is less 'shame' to the walk of shame in the morning. And always, always buy bottles of bleach 'eau de Javel' in Madagascar, which work wonders on many things: diluted in water for cleaining the cut off Eau Vive pee bottles, bleaching your feet when they get too dirty (using a large water to bleach ratio), disinfecting your water bottles etc. If you want instructions, email me.

    The former advisor.